Body image confidence starts here: How to appreciate your body for what she does, not what she looks like.

I was listening to a podcast the other week.

Jamie Lang. Good Company. Paris Fury was the guest.

And at the end, Jamie asked her what she was most proud of.

Paris said her body.

Not her looks. Not her size. Her body. For what it's done for her. For the seven children she's carried and raised. She talked about it like a person. Like someone worth being proud of.

And I was so happy because that is body appreciation out in the wild.

That's exactly what I talk about in my coaching, and I don't hear it said out loud nearly enough. Especially not by someone from a traditional background, someone the same age as me, on a mainstream podcast.

I needed to share it. So here we are.

Body appreciation isn't toxic positivity.

It's not standing in the mirror telling yourself you love every inch of yourself when you genuinely don't feel that way. 

That's not real, and it won't stick.

Body appreciation is something quieter than that. It's shifting your focus from what your body looks like, to what she actually does for you.

And when you start doing that, you like yourself more.

Diet culture has spent years, decades, teaching us that our bodies are problems to be solved. 

That smaller is better. 

That thinner is more worthy. 

That you should earn your food, shrink yourself down, and feel grateful when someone notices you've lost weight.

That culture is designed to keep you focused on the mirror. 

Because if you're focused on the mirror, you're not focused on how you actually feel.

Your body image confidence doesn't come from how you look. It comes from how you think and feel about yourself.

What I ask every client to do.

These are the three things I come back to again and again. With clients. With myself. 

Especially as I've got older and I've seen firsthand how much easier this gets when you start actually practising it.

1. Be grateful for what she does for you.

Not in a vague, woo way. 

Specifically.

I'm grateful my body let me walk to the nursery this morning, even though it was hailing. I'm grateful I slept well last night. I'm grateful my knees held up during Pilates. I'm grateful I could push the pram two kilometres and back.

Whatever comes up for you, say it. 

Out loud, in your head, in a journal. 

It doesn't matter. Just notice it.

And if you're sitting there thinking, Cara, I've got a chronic condition, I'm in pain, my body isn't doing what I want it to, I see you. I really do. 

But there will still be something. Even if it's small. Start there.

2. Thank your body parts. Yes, really.

This sounds a bit mad. I know. Stick with me.

After a walk, a workout, a swim with the kids, thank the specific body parts that showed up for you.

Thank you, knees, for those squats. Thank you, shoulders, for reaching above my head today. Thank you, lungs, for keeping up.

It's like when you have a blocked nose and you'd do absolutely anything to breathe through it again. 

You vow you'll never take it for granted. 

This is just doing that on purpose, before something goes wrong.

3. Compliment others on what their body does, not how it looks.

This one is so good with children and teenagers.

Not "you look great"  but "wow, look how high you jumped" or "you were so strong in that swimming lesson today."

Because when you shine that light on someone else, it reflects back. 

You get in the pool with your kid and your body did that. That's yours too.

Why this gets easier as you get older.

I see it all the time in my Pilates classes.

The women who come aren't there because they want to look a certain way. They're there because they want to go on weekends away. To walk around a new city. To have lunch with their friends without their body getting in the way of any of it.

They talk about bone density.

They talk about strength. 

They talk about what they want their bodies to be able to do in ten years.

And their relationship with their bodies is so much gentler than it was at 28.

I want the 28 year olds to know that too. 

I want them to start now. 

Not because it's easy, but because the earlier you shift your focus from how your body looks to what it can do, the sooner everything else gets easier.

The food stuff. The movement stuff. Living in your own head.

All of it.

Your body has been showing up for you every single day. She deserves a bit of credit.

Not when she looks a certain way. 

Now.

If this landed for you, I talked about it in a lot more depth on this week's episode of Chatting with Cara, go have a listen wherever you get your podcasts.

And if you want to do this work properly, with someone in your corner, book a free consultation call with me here. No pressure. Just a proper chat about where you are and where you want to be.